My thoughts on Jerome K. Jerome's "Three Men in a Boat"
I love "Three Men in a Boat", it is absolutely hilarious. I only wish i could meet Jerome K. Jerome, because if he's anything as funny as his book i'd die laughing. Which is of course quite a good way to die in my opinion. I especially love in chapter nine when our hero, J., describes the "Heathenish instincts of tow lines" which is strangely reminicent of the demonic desires of microphone wires.
"There is something very strange and unaccountable about a tow-line. You roll it up with as much patience and care as you would take to fold up a new pair of trousers, and five minutes afterwards, when you pick it up, it is one ghastly, soul-revolting tangle.
I do not wish to be insulting, but I firmly believe that if you took an average tow-line, and stretched it out straight across the middle of a field, and then turned your back on it for thirty seconds, that, when you looked round again, you would find that it had got itself altogether in a heap in the middle of the field, and had twisted itself up, and tied itself into knots, and lost its two ends, and become all loops; and it would take you a good half-hour, sitting down there on the grass and swearing all the while, to disentangle it again.
That is my opinion of tow-lines in general. Of course, there may be honourable exceptions; I do not say that there are not. There may be tow-lines that are a credit to their profession - conscientious, respectable tow-lines - tow-lines that do not imagine they are crochet-work, and try to knit themselves up into antimacassars the instant they are left to themselves. I say there may be such tow-lines; I sincerely hope there are. But I have not met with them."
"There is something very strange and unaccountable about a tow-line. You roll it up with as much patience and care as you would take to fold up a new pair of trousers, and five minutes afterwards, when you pick it up, it is one ghastly, soul-revolting tangle.
I do not wish to be insulting, but I firmly believe that if you took an average tow-line, and stretched it out straight across the middle of a field, and then turned your back on it for thirty seconds, that, when you looked round again, you would find that it had got itself altogether in a heap in the middle of the field, and had twisted itself up, and tied itself into knots, and lost its two ends, and become all loops; and it would take you a good half-hour, sitting down there on the grass and swearing all the while, to disentangle it again.
That is my opinion of tow-lines in general. Of course, there may be honourable exceptions; I do not say that there are not. There may be tow-lines that are a credit to their profession - conscientious, respectable tow-lines - tow-lines that do not imagine they are crochet-work, and try to knit themselves up into antimacassars the instant they are left to themselves. I say there may be such tow-lines; I sincerely hope there are. But I have not met with them."
I'd say it's absolutely the same with microphone wires, you spend the better part of a day unwinding, and then coiling and carefully putting away these wires, but then you turn your back for a second and BAM! Knots and so many other nasty things get on your nerves. I swear it's just because at some point in the past some careless person stepped on a poor baby microphone wire and so now all microphone wires feel it is their duty to make life miserable for all us humans. Quite sad really. Anyway, these are my thoughts so far on Jerome K. Jerome's book "Three Men in a Boat" which is massively enjoyable, there have been several times i have had to put down the book because my ribs ached from laughing. If you want to read it yourself i found a full copy of the book at: http://www.forgottenfutures.com/game/boat/boat.htm#chap9 I highly reccomend it. But now i must go, Cya!